Survivor Stories

Molly

Ever since I was a young girl, my dad would abuse me. Whether I would get a math problem wrong, or lie about eating the last cookie. No matter what I did or who I told, no one believed me and everyone would tell me that it "would be over soon." This was when I was in 2nd grade. 15 years later, and I still haven’t gotten over the emotional trauma and the psychological damage that came with the abuse that I had to experience. Not only that, but my dad still beats me occasionally when he doesn’t like something. My father would get drunk, find any problem he could imagine, blame me for it, and then take his anger out. While other kids got pats on the back for finishing their homework, I got abused. In an environment where I’m supposed to feel safe and protected, I instead feel petrified and nervous. One day, in 4th grade, he got exceptionally drunk and left me with bruises, a bleeding nose and lip, and a swollen eye. That was the day that it was enough. We reported him to the police the next day, and I thought that it was finally over. It wasn’t. 12 years later, and I’m left with a swollen arm, battered and bruised face and so much emotional trauma that it could last me for a lifetime. Domestic violence is an issue in society that so many people experience, but nobody talks about. I had to go through this and I don’t want other little girls like me to go through it too.

Alain

Listening to Alain describe the torture and rape he suffered in the Democratic Republic of the Congo is a soul-wrenching journey across the spectrum of what the human species is capable of. From the brutal depravity of Alain’s torturers, to the courage and nobility of Alain himself, a man who chose to confront his pain and suffering instead of descending into the violence of revenge. A pastor in a village in the Congo, Alain was swept up by government soldiers out to destroy the evidence, and the witnesses to their killings. After being tortured, Alain was saved from summary execution by a stranger. Alain, his wife and family fled the country, and arrived in Kampala, Uganda, destitute but alive. There he began to rebuild his life, starting with his deeply wounded self. Through the Refugee Law Project, he found a group of fellow survivors, other men who had endured sexual torture. Through the compassionate embrace of a church, Alain was able to re-introduce himself to God, to raise his hands up in prayer, and to feel once more embraced. Today, Alain is firmly committed to the continued healing of his wounded soul, and to a future as an activist. A man who will tell his story publicly in a land that remains dangerously hostile to his message. A man who embodies the courage and integrity that our species is capable of.

You can learn more about Alain's story on here.

Katherine

I lived in a violent marriage for years. I was very naive at first and really didnt know people like him existed. He would kick me, slap me, push me, trip me over, throw things at me, stand on my feet, yell abuse, call me names like ‘social cripple’, the list goes on and on, but he never punched me. In fact he would say to people that he couldnt stand ‘wife bashers’. He would tell me that he didn’t want the children to play with so and sos children because they were a bad influence. He tried to isolate us from all those who loved us and new people we met would go through character assasinations by him. Life was continous hell, fear and horror and he always blamed the children or me for his violence. Things got a lot worse towards the end. He would threaten to run us all off the road in the car and kill us. The violence became a daily occurance if not several episodes a day.

ADVICE: If I could come and help you leave I would but it is you who has to do it. Leaving permanently is the only thing that will change the situation. You cant make him better no matter how much you love him. It is NOT your fault, it is his. You are a wonderful person and deserve so much better. You are not alone, there are many people who know what you are going through. Reach out to people and contact support groups like those who own this website, they are the experts. Most of all believe in yourself and know you are strong.

You can learn more about Katherine's story on here.